The Golden Rule

I have problems with the Golden Rule for a number of reasons. One of them is that although they teach it in schools for children to use interpersonal situations, they do not seem to ever apply it to the adults themselves.


Function: noun
1 : one that has arrived at full development or maturity especially in size, strength, or intellectual capacity.

Maturity. Hmm, there’s a concept that Wendy Portillo has apparently never heard of. This demonstrated of course by her actions against a five year old boy who is in the process of being dxed with Asperger’s Syndrome. He was a student in her class. She let all of the students in the class say something that they didn’t like about him, and then made them take a vote on whether or not they should vote him out of the class.

Now, what I propose we do is let her peers all do the same thing to her. They can all stand in a circle around her and tell her everything they don’t like about her. Then they can take a vote and see if they would like to vote her off the island out of the school. Seem fair to you?

Oh, and if you really feel like getting pissed off, there is a comment section on another version of this article here. Go read. If you didn’t understand why aspies often don’t like NTs, this is a really good example of why.

For example, here are a few of the comments:

Funny how when I was growing up, there weren’t all these syndromes or disorders to make excuses for bad kids.
If I was bad, I was sent to the principles office with a cricket type of paddle and then when I got home I got it again. Funny how we all survived and became good citizens unlike the “time out” punishment the kids get today and the thugs they become later on.
The world is full of excuses for bad parenting when the truth of the matter is bad kids are the result of bad parents.
Keep feeding your kids drugs to control them because you have no spine for a good whack across the butt with a belt.

Oh yeah, and that’s why so many adults are on antidepressants now. Right. You’re real bright. Good job on spelling “principal” wrong too.

The student is a constant distraction. How are other kids supposed to learn? It teaches the kid that his own peers don’t approve of his behavior either. That’s why we have a nation of whimpy children…boo hoo, he got kicked out of class. Too bad. Learn how to act appropriately and you won’t have to worry about people voting you out.
Why would you sue? That’s absolutely ridiculous. Don’t you want to teach your child how to act in school? It’s a lesson. Let the kid learn from it.

Yeah, let’s teach this generation of kids how to be bullies too; just like their parents.

Smack the living hell of the kid. If any of you self-esteem, give every f&(n kid an award, Hilary Clinton bangers disagree. Look how Fucked up our society is because you need to give you kid affection instead of discipline.

God forbid we try to love our children, right?

The teacher should be given an award for attempting to establish some discipline in her class. Even a five year old knows that bad behavior has consequences and maybe this five year old will finally get the message. Obviously the parents haven’t been doing their job. Keep up the good work!

I wish I could tell you all that I was making these comments up. Unfortunately.

No she should not be fired. Maybe if more teachers were like this, the children who refused to obide by the rules of the classroom would learn that it is not acceptable and that it upsets everyone. Bullys and mischeivous kids need to be better discipled by their parents. What have the parents done to teach their child to respect his teacher and classmates. Obvioulsy not enough if the child has to be taught by the teacher. Wake up parents…the buke stops with you…not the schools. It is about time the parents accept responsibility for their childrens actions rather than trying to blame the teachers or the school system. So your child was humiliated in front of the class…maybe if he were a good listener it would not have happened in the first place. At least now he knows the truth and hopefully will start behaving as he should.

Oh, I understand now! Paddle the bullies! So let’s paddle the teacher, huh? Who gets to do that? I vote for the mom, personally. She seems like a reasonable type.

10 to 1 if this kid had been a rich kid, she wouldn’t have gotten away with it either.

Oh, and btw, I’ll go one step further. I did the research (I always do, don’t I?), and here’s the kindergarten page for this school:
This is her email address: Feel free to write something.

HERE’s the link to the administration page. Mrs. Marcia Cully. She’s the principal who didn’t do anything to help child who was wrongfully abused at the hands of WENDY PORTILLO.

It’s always this way. They claim to love children. They claim to want to help children. They claim to be for the children. But only certain children. Only the ones that they feel like helping. Only the “normal” children.


BTW, I’m not the only one who is pissed off. Join in.

I’m compiling a list of all the posts I can find on this. If you did one and you’re not on the list, let me know:

  1. Whitterer on autism
  2. Leftbrainrightbrain
  3. Action for autism
  4. Asperger Square 8
  5. Maternal Instincts…Flying By the Seat of My Pants
  6. The Joy of autism
  7. Drive mom crazy
  8. Whose Planet Is It Anyways?
  9. Odd One Out
  10. Cogitamus
  11. Odd Time Signatures
  12. Stop. Think. Autism
  13. Along the spectrum
  14. Andrea’s Buzzing About
  15. Foggyrock
  16. The Diaper Heads
  17. Memoirs of a chaotic mommy
  18. Life with Joey
  19. The Rettdevil Rants
  20. ASAN
  21. Livs Journey
  22. Big white hat
  23. Ballastexistenz
  24. Aspie-editorial
  25. Being ammey
  26. The Anthill
  27. Thinking in Metaphors
  28. Lone Wolfs Den
  29. Jonathan Turley
  30. Lyndon
  31. Retired Waif
  32. Lorem Ipsum
  33. Digital Journal
  34. Disability Studies, Temple U.
  35. Mommy life
  36. Panic’s Deep Thoughts
  37. Are You Going To Be This Way The Rest Of The Time I Know You?
  38. Charming Bitch
  39. The Adventures of Leelo and his Potty-mouthed Mom
  40. DC Metro Moms
  41. Enter the Jabberwock
  42. Incertus
  43. Eric Berlin
  44. Awalkabout
  45. The Gimp Parade
  46. Man, or Maniac?
  47. Autism Vox
  48. Apple Tree
  49. Club166
  50. A Room of Mama’s Own
  51. The Strangest Alchemy
  52. Suspect Device: The Blog
  53. Huzzah!
  54. Beartwinsmom
  55. Pipecleaner Dreams
  56. The Squiggly Line of Thought
  57. Highboldtage
  58. Dvorak Uncensored
  59. Social Skills and Asperger’s Syndrome
  60. The Quaker Agitator
  61. Bohemian Booklover
  62. The Church of the Apocalyptic Kiwi
  63. How This Old Brit Sees It
  64. Stirring the Pot
  65. Disaboom
  66. Midlife and Treachery
  67. Celebritique
  68. Sanabitur anima mea
  69. To Be Great Is To Be Misunderstood
  70. I Can Only Imagine
  71. Up On Eagle’s Wings
  72. A Life Less Ordinary?
  73. Kaleidoglide
  74. Cripchick
  75. Daily Kos (full of a lot of information)
  76. Marla Baltes
  77. Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop
  79. Fatherhood Examiner
  80. EditorMom
  81. It’s Atypical Neurolognorosis I Tell Ya
  82. Wheelie Catholic
  83. Free Falling
  84. The Lawdog
  85. Sheila Schoonmaker
  86. Knitting Clio
  87. Squeaky Wheel Seeks Grease
  88. Mamita Mala – One Bad Mami
  89. Chaos Theory
  90. Candy Basford’s Weblog
  91. Just An Ordinary Day
  92. The Quirk Factor . . . Resistance is Futile
  93. Planet of the Blind
  94. Victoria’s Corner
  95. This Little Light
  96. Space Cat’s Garden
  97. Daughter of the Ring of Fire
  99. My Life As A Platypus–Goldie’s Quest for Identity
  100. Stoneleafunfounddoor
  101. Discussing Autism

Plus a discussion or two:

Democratic Underground
Wrong Planet Barton Discussion
Soap Zone Barton Discussion

And a petition:

Petition against Wendy Portillo

I just got wind of an email from Melissa Barton, Alex’s mother. She said that the thing to do here is to contact:

Office of Governor Charlie Crist
State of Florida
The Capitol
400 S. Monroe St.
Tallahassee, FL 32399-0001

Citizen Services Hotline: (850) 488-4441
Executive Office of the Governor Switchboard: (850) 488-7146
[Office hours are 8:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. Eastern Time]

Fax: (850) 487-0801

For individuals with hearing loss or speech disability:
1-850-922-7795 (TTY)
711 (Florida Telecommunication Relay)

ASAN – Autistic Self Advocacy Network has also issued a statement on this. In particular, I highlight this section:

Please be polite yet firm in your comments, pointing out the unacceptability of such actions when aimed at any student, as well as the need for this school to adopt policies to prevent this from happening in the future. This is an opportunity to drive home the message that we will not stand by while one of our own is abused. We ask that you please cc: in your e-mails to the school district so we can keep track of the strength and sources of this response. Remember: abusive messages hurt our cause – please be respectful in your comments.

I guess this really emphasizes the quality of that thing which NTs refer to as empathy. And they say that we’re unaware???

~ by lastcrazyhorn on May 25, 2008.

89 Responses to “The Golden Rule”

  1. You know, that makes me feel very sad. I can’t figure out whether people just completely missed the fact that Alex is on the spectrum or whether they would have said those things anyway? Whichever is the case, it shows how much we all need to educate and inform public opinion. I honestly thought we were further along than this.
    Best wishes

  2. Thanks. Well true, the other article didn’t mention AS, but plenty of other people brought it up; so I don’t see how people could have completely missed it.

  3. Maddy, they knew Alex was on the spectrum because they suggested the parents have him evaluated, and knew he was being evaluated. What that teacher did was evil. Just plain evil.

  4. […] Read the rest of this great post here […]

  5. I had a school social worker tell me after my AS son was choked the 4th time by the same kid, that of course it’s wrong but maybe this way he will learn making noises will get him a negative response because that is what will happen in society. This is what my son deals with in school, a public school too. It is a mentality that says kids high on the Autism Spectrum have willful behaviors vs behaviors that are a manifestation of a developmental disability. I personally, as a mom have been fed up and now as a human being feel called to action.

  6. I read the first page of comments at the first link, and that was all I could stand.

    When I did read about kindergartners voting, I immediately thought about South Park.

    Five-year-olds are traditionally considered to be younger than the age of reason.

    A five-year-old aspie might be reasonable, though.

    And what’s with this gummint-skool kindergarten, anyway? When I was five years old in FL, my folks sent me to private kindergarten, because the State had not extended its tentacles down to that age group, quite yet.

    The government school system, as designed by Dewey and the rest of the Pwogs (progressives) really was intended to turn out a bunch of pliable compliant workers, not free citizens who could think for themselves

  7. Great post! Teachers like Portillo really give the absolutely brilliant teachers in our country a bad name. I truly hope that the principal and school board members walk in and find that parents are not tolerating this kind of ‘teaching’ anymore. Thank you for getting the word out!

  8. Yemmas – in public school, I received death threats from other students. It didn’t make me want to curb my mouth, but instead further enforced the concept that I was alone in the world.

    Justthisguy – I was remembering that fact too. School systems are just there to make us in to good little workers. Yet, her actions wouldn’t have been tolerated in a workplace; so something’s wrong there too.

    Angela – 🙂

  9. I cant respond atm. I would like to have a word with that teacher. She reminds me of my grade 8 teacher in public school. For anyone who knows how bad my grade 8 was…

    My hart goes out to this boy and his family. I read the whole article but I cant comment cause it makes me so angry reading what this teacher did. I think that teacher should be fired and forbidden from working with kids.

    I cant speak I feel too angry at the stupidity of the teacher.


  10. I know how you feel. It was all I could do to keep from bursting into a long stream of cuss words within this post.

  11. I can’t seem to cry because I’m so MAD! If this teacher was ever in a position to teach my son….I truly believe she should no longer be in a position anywhere near children. What an awful example to set. I know, in our case, my son tries so hard to be a “good boy” and “follow the rules” and be nice to his friends. I can imagine if something like this happened to him because of issues he was not able to control he would cry for a very long time.

  12. This incident reminds me all too much of the stuff I went through in school as well. Never got voted out, but I always suspected forbearance on the part of the teachers who stood idly by an nary ever punished the bullies I had to put up with.

    My heart goes out to this kid, and every child that has ever had to put up with a teacher like Wendy Portillo.

    Teachers like that are far too common. And it does indeed, like Angela mentions, drown out the absolutely fantastic teachers that are out there. I know I had at least two of them.

    oh and lastcrazyhorn… you’re insane. But I’d buy your book.

  13. Angela, one can be not only invested in a wrong, bad, system, but also incompetent, even at being wrong and bad.

  14. I’m so glad you posted about this, and so glad you included that information at the bottom. I’m beyond horrified that the state’s attorney didn’t find this incident emotionally abusive?

    I wouldn’t call it “emotionally abusive” either.
    I’d call it “nightmarish.”

    Oh, and the comments section seemed, with few exceptions, to be generated by the wacky factory, so I honestly can’t give them much credence. Yikes.

  15. I don’t understand it. This kid is 5, FIVE! She had his ‘peers’ ie other FIVE year olds “vote”? Why don’t we just start the abuse now, just start reinforcing now, as this poor child says, “I’m not special.”

    It’s disgusting. Distgusting. I can’t believe that woman, that “educator” can live with herself after what she has done to that kid. I only hope his parents are able to find some way to help turn it into some level of a positive, even if that positive is to show him that someone DOES love him and DOES think he’s special, them, his parents think that; by standing up for him and telling him that that teacher and his ‘peers’ are wrong.

  16. I told over and over and over, when I was a dog agility judge, told “you can NEVER be below reproach.” Why aren’t these “educators” being taught the same thing, “you can NEVER be below reproach” these are kid’s emotional and physical well being at stake here.

  17. His mother wrote on another person’s blog that she is so thankful for what we are doing to get the word out. She also talked about how much she loves him for who he is. She’s a good’n, I feel.

    We can do something about this. It’s time to start writing letters. But let’s do like ASAN suggests – keep ’em civil. We don’t have to stoop to their level.

  18. […] […]

  19. I just want to fly to Florida and hug this little boy. here’s a link to the “Alex is special” campaign
    They’re having people send cards to give to alex, telling him that he’s special. As someone who loves and works with some FANTASTIC kids on the spectrum I can’t imagine anyone saying anything like that to them. My kids are special, fabulous and can do anything they want. I hope they never feel what Alex feels. I can’t wait until I get to teach kids as fabulous as Alex, and I hope that they feel special.

  20. Great idea. I added you to the list.

  21. I posted about this too, here:

  22. I’m so incredibly angry about this, I could spit nails and blood.

    I’m writing a post about this right now. I’ll send you the link when I’m done, and I’ll be linking to your post as well.

    I’ve seen you around the ‘sphere on FXSmom’s blog and A Walk About’s blog, too. I’m glad I finally stopped by. 🙂

    Warm regards,
    Michelle aka The Beartwinsmom

  23. Outrageous!
    This woman is not only a awful teacher, she is a awful human being.
    She needs to apologize to this young boy….and then she needs to be voted out of the school system. Her entire class will be effected by this. She gave the other students a lesson in prejudice that day.

  24. Corys mom( a child with Aspergers):
    May 27th, 2008 at 5:03 am
    He is beautiful.
    There is something very
    different about this guy.
    He may be quite awkward.
    But he is never shy.
    He is very intelligent,
    in a whole new light.
    Different is true,
    he may or may not impress you.
    Ive seen the looks, the angry glares.
    Go ahead and judge him,
    dont even give him a care!
    Did you ever stop to think?
    Someone is watching you,
    someone in grief.
    This disease hurts,
    this disease is wild!
    This is not some crazy person.
    This is my Aspergers child!!!

    written for my beautiful son Cory!!

    by Paula Bennett

  25. Thanks for dropping by Michelle. 🙂 Glad to finally “meet” you. 😀

    And Carlene, I agree 100%.

  26. Paula – nice. 🙂

  27. […] KIND OF BEHAVIOR ENCOURAGED. The first rule always is “Do no harm.” A fellow blogger, Last Crazy Horn, says that we should follow The Golden Rule. I […]

  28. Here’s my post:

    I’m shaking from the anger…. I also added more contact info. 😉

  29. I also wrote a short blog ( and pointed my readers to your site. Thanks for compiling all this information.

  30. Added both of you! 🙂 Thanks for letting me know.

  31. […] many bloggers with Autism or Asperger's Syndrome have participated in a blogstorm that supports Barton's family and opposes the reality-show style punishment Alex […]

  32. Wow. I can’t believe those comments. Those people have never met a child with an autism spectrum disorder, for one thing. My autistic son is far more sensitive than my neurotypical son, and a harsh punishment would only traumatize him, not “teach him a lesson.” If/when he can’t control himself, it’s not because he doesn’t want to; it’s because in that moment he’s not able to. But I’m glad to see some idiots think that humiliating him and using a belt would fix it. I fear for this world sometimes.

  33. I just wanted to thank you for providing such an exhaustive resource for people who want more information about this case (and what we can do to support this poor kid). I’ve very much enjoyed reading your insights.

  34. Well, thanks for reading and you’re welcome. 🙂

  35. Nice job on the post-
    Ohmigod…you know this hits so close to home for me because it’s happening to my son. I can’t even write a proper comment right now because I’m flooded with rage.

  36. […] I might mention that on my blog, I’ve been collecting a list of bloggers who have written in outrage on this topic. As of this afternoon, that list was at 63 total. Yesterday that number was half of that. Many of these bloggers are on the spectrum themselves. To see the post in question, click here. […]

  37. I thought of you, actually. Well, at least we’re giving you more fuel to fight with.

  38. I’ve got this blogged, too. Thanks for this comprehensive information.

  39. […] Although I have not even begun to dip into all of the blog posts written on this case— it’s now estimated at 50 people that have already blogged about this!—I am surprised at the way we as a community and as individuals frame this issue. Much of the […]

  40. You’re welcome Emily. 🙂 And you’re on the list now. 😀

  41. […] 7:19PM From the comments, you can find a more complete list of bloggers here, and you can sign a petition here to request this teacher’s termination. Sphere: Related […]

  42. Please do not ascribe this heinous teacher behavior to neurotypicalism. This teacher was cruel–this did not happen because the little boy has Asperger’s syndrome and it did not happen because the teacher was neurotypical (we do not know she was, actually.) Like any abuse, it happened because an abuser was present. Sadly, all of those children were abused that day–they will all be waiting for that ax to fall on them at some point. Innocence was lost all around.

  43. I’ve been thinking about Alex Barton, and Wendy Portrillo, all day. Portrillo’s actions were ESPECIALLY cruel because he (by news accounts) is on the autism spectrum….but even if he wasn’t, even if he wasn’t a child with attentional difficulties, what Portrillo did was sadistic, cruel, and a disgrace to the teaching profession.

    I’d cut Ms. Portrillo a tiny bit of slack if she had been a newly minted teacher. But, according to the news reports, she’s been in the classroom for more than a decade.

    I’ve had spotty internet access for the last 21 days, which may not let up anytime soon.

    I have a great deal of respect for the SpEd blogosphere. I wish somebody with more electronic chops that I have would survey the classroom/special-education-teacher blogosphere for their reactions to Ms. Portillo’s appalling approach to inclusion.

  44. I just blogged about this too. thanks for putting our voices together.

  45. You can add my post to your list.

    This is just too pathetic for words. But I still tried.

  46. Lawdog has a post about this, too. He’s at

    He’s also a moderator at The High Road, a gun forum to which I belong, as well as being a Sheriff’s Deputy in a not-very-populous county in Texas.

    He seems right peeved at Ms. Portillo, to put it mildly. I think he mentioned a horsewhip.

    One thing I’ve noticed about honorable soldiers and honest cops; they get really, really annoyed at those who pick on the small and weak.

  47. […] more support for Alex and his mother, see this. Possibly related posts: (automatically generated)What is the REAL meaning of success?This is our […]

  48. […] on May 28, 2008. There are a number of disability blogs discussing this outrageous report of a kindergarten teacher in Florida named Wendy Portillo, who […]

  49. I posted a couple of times about it.

    Words cannot express how irritated I am.

  50. Got you all. 🙂

  51. Link to article

  52. Hey there lastcrazyhorn,

    Thanks for linking to my blog. Disaboom would like to send little Alex a care package, and we’ve got the address for the Alex Is Special packages. However, one of the folks here at the office is the dad of an Aspie boy who went through something similar, and he’d like to reach out personally to the parents of Alex Barton. Do you have an email address where he could get in touch?


  54. Got her already at #14. 🙂

  55. Just added mine. Awesome post- you really nailed it.

  56. Hi. Thanks for including my blog post in your list. Here’s another Alex Barton post from the blog “Victoia’s Corner”

  57. […] Making Connections This whole Alex Barton thing really has gotten me […]

  58. You’re welcome. 🙂 I also appreciate your contribution of another link.

    And Mommydearest – thanks. 😀

  59. […] behavior and education. Alex is in both videos (waving to the audience at one point, it seems). Odd One Out has been keeping a list of bloggers (94 so far) and I’ll be adding blog posts about Alex on […]

  60. If you find it worthy of being added to your list, we put up a post at Both Hands and a Flashlight entitled “This Little Light”.

    Thanks for putting all this together!

  61. You want her address & phone number? I saw it someplace….

  62. Thank you for the link. A very important subject that raises a lot of issues.



  65. Me too! I’m a little late…

    reminds me of a public version of those “slam books”. Haven’t some schools banned them? Yet here is a teacher doing a PUBLIC one! I want to vomit.

  66. thank you for your post and for the list of bloggers writing about this outrageous incident. i wrote about it on my blog as well:

  67. Thank you both for your contributions, and you’re welcome. 🙂 Too late would be not caring at all. So you’re fine. 🙂

  68. Thank you for the link. (#75)

  69. Woot! Thanks for contributing. 🙂 I really liked reading your thoughts on this issue.

  70. FWIW, here’s the URL to my thoughts on this whole mess: Though I doubt I say anything that hasn’t been said.

  71. Hey, but you did help us clear the 3 digit mark. 😀

  72. Oops! Forgot Mine! I’ve got two up at Discussing Autism.

  73. […] One Out by Marcie Over 100 posts to read about Alex Barton and the followers who have rallied to his defense. Did You Enjoy this […]

  74. I did a second post. don’t flame me, it is not directed at any one in particular but more cautionary, something to think about.

    plus I am still really mad about what happened to alex. I atill get lumps in my throat.

  75. Why would I flame you? I only flame trolls and bigots. Hmm, I think that was redundant.

  76. oh, sorry should have been more clear… “don’t flame me” was directed to anyone in general out there in the blog-sphere who might read it and disagree with me, but not you b/c I have read enough of your site to tell you would not do that.

    I am not a bigot, but sometimes I must admit I feel a bit troll-ish… or at least impish.

  77. I personally spoke with Alex’s mother, Melissa, the other day on the phone. She expressed to me that she is still very much committed in pursuing this matter until justice for Alex has been done and that she thoroughly appreciates the encouragement and support that she has been receiving for both Alex and the rest of the family. I got in touch with Melissa after watching her interview on The Early Show, and heard that Alex had been repeating to himself that, “He was not special, He was not special”; it was so sad to hear what he had just been through and how it was having the negative reaction on him. With the help of Alex’s Card Drive that Barbara Curtis at initiated, we were able to send Alex one of our Tell Me Teddy units that should help him get back on track and believing that “He is somebody special” by changing the way he sees himself. Alex is such a charming young boy and it radiates in the interviews shows in his photos, he is going to overcome this situation with flying colors.

    Todays school systems have gotten completely out of hand with everything from teachers abusing students, having sex with students, and everything in between. It is parents such as Melissa that take the initiative and the ability to stand up and do the right thing for their child that is needed. There are so many unreported acts of abuse in the schools that nobody ever hears about because of either lack of parental involvement or the school district administrators allowing student abuse issues to continue or go unresolved in fear of creating a public outcry or lawsuit. Parents need to be more involved with what is happening with their children and their schooling. The education a child receives at school, their friends, their individual struggles and problems shape these children into who they are to become later in life especially at a young age such as Alex. I am happy to be working together with Melissa to help Alex and fully support her in her fight to get this teacher removed from teaching and further bring attention to such a key matter that can no longer be overlooked. The support that everyone has shown for Melissa and Alex is awesome, much applause goes out to everyone who believes this is something worth the effort and has done something to help keep this from disappearing.

    Ken Hall

  78. what really pisses me off, and I am an aspie, is that we live in such a “PC” culture where you can be called a racist for saying black board, or a sexist just for being a male with a sex drive, but ableism seems to get overlooked, treated as “normal” behavior.
    It’s like saying “hey, discriminate against disabled people all you like, theyr more of sympathetic house pets than human beings, but racism/sexism are evil”. It’s sheer fucking hypocracy… I’m not condoning racism or sexism either…. But it’s fucking hypocritical of our society, to only give a damn about the rights of a people if there is a fashion trend to support it.
    Like all those lesbians who aren’t even lesbians, they do it because it’s a trend; “oh look at me I’m sooooooo open minded, I like men and women” or “oh wow look at me, I just kissed a girl”… I have no problem with **real** legit lesbians either… But when civil rights are a popularity contests, or a fasion trend, something isn’t clicking in peoples’ heads…. And, our culture promotes ignorance so this is unlikely to change anytime soon.
    Segregation is still alive and well, segregation never ended because it was never acknowledged from the perspective of disabled or differently abled people. Even when female/black leaders were making waves in the 60’s/70’s, they never once challenged the assumption that disability is a legit form of inequality.

  79. hell, “progressive” for us is still a sheer minstrel show. Yeah, a minstrel show. Like when the democratic debates came up (I am neither leftist or rightwing, I don’t believe in politics personally), they had a “disability rights” add where they took the lowest functiong braindead, drooling guy they could find, in a wheel chair, and placed cue cards in his hands for an “abled” spokesperson/nanny figure to read off of, to say what the medical companies needed him to say in order to sell their medications…. And this sets the idea that ALL disabled people are cross-eyed and drooling, helpless, pity parties…
    Even “care givers” and “advocates” and this system, refuses to make any distinction on functioning levels, and prefers to assume we’re all too stupid to advocate for ourselves… This is why the voices of thousands of aspies are being ignored when we tell them that we don’t need to be “cured”, we need to be understood and accepted, as equals. Pity is an insult. The pity stops here. I AM A MAN, NOT A CHILD, 28 YRS OLD LONG AND STRONG, ASPIE, AND NOT ASHAMED.

  80. That’s that effin’ Autism Speaks POV. They think that if you can advocate for yourself, then you’re too high functioning to count. I wouldn’t believe it if I hadn’t actually experienced it myself from people claimin’ to have our best interests at heart.

  81. “I wouldn’t believe it if I hadn’t actually experienced it myself from people claimin’ to have our best interests at heart.”

    If you have a post about that I would be interested to read it. I am still learning about all the different groups and POVs (and don’t seem to like the POV you mentioned above)

  82. i really dislike when people say that if i can advocate for myself i must not be dissabled. Or when people look at me and say i look normal.

    Honestly even within the charge group I dont even feel like i belong cause I dont have any obvious facial deformities. Honestly I feel like when I look at all the Asperger characteristics I feel it would be more accurate to be Aspie not CHARGE. I really dont fit anywhere and im just not enough of anything to fit with anyone.


  83. Thanks for the link (#37). I’m not on the spectrum, and neither is my son. But I am a human, and I just wanted to cry when I first read about this.

  84. I like that the folks that believe that beating a child into compliance all think that the proof that this works is in their existence as healthy and well adjusted citizens — when they so clearly are not.

  85. […] This could easily have been me. I know there were years when, given the opportunity, the class would have voted me out; this is not unusual for Aspies. While the teacher actually allowing such a vote may be extreme, it is worth remembering that young children pick up adult attitudes about their peers. They see who can and can’t be bullied. […]

  86. i am truly disgusted by this my son has a high functioning autistic disorder and is always looked at differently. it drives me absolutely insane that people are so unaware that they truly can’t control these behavoirs. my son is the most kindest, thoughtful child i know and i believe it is because he has the gift of seeing the world differently than the so called “normal”. shame on those who choose to blame the parents for their lack of knowledge of their disorder. if the world had more people like these children we probably would be such a friendlier place.

  87. “If you didn’t understand why Aspies often don’t like NTs, this is a really good example of why.”

    FINALLY! THANK YOU for finally showing everyone why. I’m often accused of being ‘elitist’ or ‘full of hubris’ or ‘supremacist’, just because I think most NTs are vile, disgusting monsters who treat those who aren’t like them and their immediate group of pals as if they were worms to be trampled on. Why is it wrong of me to point out that most people are evil, when they are currently spitting on me and my fellow Aspies for no other reason that we are Aspies? Why is this a bad thing? Someone please explain this to me… on second thought, don’t. I don’t want to understand why many NTs are plain bad folk. The less I know, the better.

    Also just because I can, a little thing I wrote that keeps receiving flak for being ‘arrogant’ or whatever. I’m sure you will understand the real message.

    Asperger’s Syndrome? Let me give you a run-down on what it’s like.

    Imagine you’re a regular, normal human being. You have your wants, you have your needs, you have your hopes and dreams. But, everyone else around you, are dogs. They wag their tails when they are happy, growl when they are angry, and sniff each other’s crap and bark about it to communicate with each other. You, however, do not do these things: you smile, you talk, you laugh, you cry. You have a lot of trouble trying to communicate with dogs the same way dogs do instinctively.

    Your mind is completely alien to all the dogs around you. You think in concepts that they cannot fathom, and you find their mentality even more incomprehensible. You simply cannot grasp the dogs’ modes of thought and communication, so you for the most part elect not to do so. Well, not completely. Decades of exposure and necessity has lead you to learn some of the art of barking and urine-huffing. But, it is always an act, and you feel filthy for doing so. This dichotomy of you knowing that barking and rubbing your nose in dog urine is stupid, while wishing you could do so without gagging — if only to get by, get through each day where they run the show — fills a deep well of confusion and frustration that you cannot hope to empty. And you are alone in this world, surrounded and crowded by barking, urine-sniffing dogs.

    You alone see the many problems dogs have with eachother and the world around them. You almost never understand why or how they’ve gotten into so many messes, that you think would be easily avoided if they would just stop and look in front of them for but one moment. Not only do they seem incapable of figuring out what seems glaringly obvious to you, though, dogs merrily go about their way as if they have no idea they have problems in the first place! But you can immediately design solutions for those problems. Not only that, but you can and want to engineer new modes of philosophical thought, systems of government, efficient fuel consumption, ways to minimize war and world hunger, mathematical computations and scientific theories to describe the underlying fabric of reality, etc. to make the world a better place for everyone. If only you could communicate these ideas outside of your head in a way dogs, or you, could understand.

    However, even if you could, they will not hear you. Not only can’t dogs understand, in fact, they won’t. They are inexplicably hostile to the very idea of understanding you. All they know is you are different, and that makes you easy prey. Your nose doesn’t detect nearly as many scents as theirs, you lack their instinctual understanding of pack hierarchy, you cannot run as fast as they, and you lack their teeth and coordinated hunting prowess. Because of this, you have become a pariah, an inferior, an omega. They fear, hate, and attack you and your differences, and your only defense is shouting “WHY!?”.

    Despite the fact that you merely imagine in methods that they do not, have other amusements and stimulations as they, possess wants and needs counter to most of them, and can think circles around any of them, the dogs that run the world have thoughtlessly concluded that there’s something wrong with *you*, all because you don’t cheerfully sniff excrement like everybody else.

    THAT’S an Aspie’s world.

    You’re welcome.

  88. “If you didn’t understand why Aspies often don’t like NTs, this is a really good example of why.”

    FINALLY! THANK YOU for finally showing everyone why. I’m often accused of being ‘elitist’ or ‘full of hubris’ or ‘supremacist’, just because I think most NTs are vile, disgusting monsters who treat those who aren’t like them and their immediate group of pals as if they were worms to be trampled on. Why is it wrong of me to point out that most people are evil, when they are currently spitting on me and my fellow Aspies for no other reason that we are Aspies? Why is this a bad thing? Someone please explain this to me… on second thought, don’t. I don’t want to understand why many NTs are plain bad folk. The less I know, the better.

    Also just because I can, a little thing I wrote that keeps receiving flak for being ‘arrogant’ or whatever. I’m sure you will understand the real message. (which will have to come in multiple parts as it’s a biggun)

  89. hi, nice to meet everybody

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