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“Music Takes The Child Out Of Himself”

There are several facts, which appear to prove themselves daily in Music Therapy with retarded or autistic children and their response to music of certain types. In his most primitive state man’s first response to music was to rhythm, while melody remained an accessory. And so it is with both the retarded and autistic child; rhythm has proven an opening wedge to gain his interest, to penetrate his secret world of fears and phantasies, to enter into his inmost personality.

The autistic child seems to be the most difficult to reach, and yet his response to music is instinctive. There are youngsters who have a block insofar as comprehension of words; but the world of music, being largely one of memory, of imagination and feeling, seems able to reach them and prove meaningful. In the midst of a humdrum world, with its constant pressure, music takes the child out of himself.

Italics and bold were added by me. The article/chapter itself is called “Music Therapy for Retarded and Autistic Children.” It was written by a music therapist by the name of “Louise E. Weir.” I put the name in quotations into Google and got back five hits. Five. And of those five, only three were in English. And of those three, one is an obituary (which may or may not be the same person’s husband), one is an article that mentions her name under the “Thoughtful Family Remembrances” section, and the third is a JSTOR article called “Music Therapy for the Speech-Handicapped” by Albert T. Murphy and Ruth Fitz Simons (The Elementary School Journal, Vol. 59, No. 1 (Oct., 1958), pp. 39-45). The article by Weir was referenced in this article.

So what’s the big deal? Other than the fact that this is a cool quote? :)

My library is giving away books this week. There are two sets of carts: the books on the blue carts are free, and the books on the white carts cost 25 cents each. I’ve found more than a couple of interesting books, but none compare to the one I laid my hands on last night.

The Weir article is found in a book calmly titled “Music Therapy.” Ah, but there’s more to it than that. This is what it reads on the first page:

Music Therapy 1952

Second Book of Proceedings of the National Association for Music Therapy

Founded 1950

Volume II

Papers from the Third Annual Convention, Topeka Kansas

Esther Goetz Gilliland, Editor

Lawrence, Kansas

Published by the National Association for Music Therapy

1953

That Weir article is from 1953. This is an original printing. I looked this book up online. I only found it a couple of places. One of which was on Amazon, where it was listed as a used book by an independent seller. That’s it.

This book is a compilation of literature written by the people who started music therapy.  I learn about these folks in class every day:  Thayer E. Gaston, Don Michel, Ira M. Altshuler, Arthur Fultz, just to name a few.  What’s more is that Michel actually later taught at Texas Woman’s University (my grad school).  This is our history.

How many other articles written back in the 50s can you think of about autism?  Okay, now how many can you think of that were written like the quote above?

While you think on that, let me share with you a quote that I found in the second article:

Children respond best, experience shows, when musical activities are guided by teachers who accept the child as he is and take every care to give him the emotional surety of a classroom climate where understanding abounds.

I was described the other day by someone who knows me pretty well.  They told me that I “exuded acceptance.”  I think that’s a pretty nice compliment.  :)

Music therapists are the kinds of people who are open to new possibilities.  They accept other people for who they are.  They approach their work with a belief that they are working to treat the whole person.  In music therapy, you are seen for who you are.  And if we as therapists have to search a bit for that person, then we do.  And that’s what it’s about.

Asperger’s Syndrome? What’s That? Installment 1

I know that when my doc mentioned the words “Asperger’s Syndrome” to me, I really didn’t have a good sense of what they meant. I had run across the words once before, but I didn’t really remember what they were about.

Asperger’s Syndrome is a high-functioning form of autism that is defined largely by social difficulties and sensory oddities. There’s more of course to it than that, but that works as a basic definition for those new to this world.

Social difficulty examples: Not being able to gauge other peoples’ reactions during conversations to what you’re saying. This results in people saying that you talk too much and are ignoring the social clues to when it’s time to stop talking. In the case of people with Asperger’s Syndrome, you don’t ignore the social clues; you just don’t notice them to begin with.

Asperger’s Syndrome (also known as “AS”) can also be described as a form of social immaturity. People with AS tend to get stuck on topics and will talk to them to death. It doesn’t even matter if someone changes the subject. People with AS will often just bring up the same topic later on in the conversation, after everyone has seemingly forgotten about it.

People with AS almost always have special interests that they research with a specialized sort of hyperfocus that is rarely seen in other parts of their lives. They learn everything that there is to know about these subjects and can, at times, sound like university professors–or in the case of children, they are often referred to as “little professors.”

My middle brother, who is not officially on the spectrum (although I believe he probably is and this next story is one of the reasons why), was once in a museum with our family (before I was born) and got separated from them somehow. When they finally found him, he was leading a tour and telling the history of all of the dinosaurs in that part of the museum. “And from this era, we have the . . .” kind of stuff. Oh, did I mention that he was only five at the time???

These special interests tend to change over time. Also, usually, people with AS don’t have just one special interest, but rather they have several; some they drop as they get older for new things and some that stay with them forever. For example, I’ve been obsessed with Batman for as long as I can remember. On the other hand, I was also seriously obsessed with the X-Files from about 6th grade through 9th. I must say though, that that is no longer one of my main interests. I still like the show, but I don’t dream about the characters or write papers on them anymore. *laughs* One good thing about these special interests is that frequently people with AS can turn a special interest (or two) into a career. Like me. I’ve been obsessed with psychology since I was in my early teens (I’m 24 now), and I’ve loved music and have been involved with it ever since I could cry. :) So it makes sense for me to obtain a master’s in Music Therapy, no?

AS is currently diagnosed more in boys than in girls. It’s believed by many of those on the spectrum (the autism spectrum) that this is incorrect, and that there are probably just far more undiagnosed girls out there.

This article talks a bit about women on the spectrum. Here’s a good quote from it:

Some women talked about the resentment they felt toward people, who for many years had been trying to teach them “socially appropriate” ways of acting. “Enough already!” was a common response.

Both autism and AS are housed under the same category, which is called “Autism Spectrum Disorders” or ASDs. It is referred to as a spectrum because of the many wide and diverse levels of functioning found all over the continuum of ASDs. For example, a person might be a brilliant teacher, but then not be able to balance a checkbook to save their life.

People with AS also tend to call themselves “aspies” for short. Speaking as an aspie, I can tell you that I actually prefer that term. Also, while person-first language dictates that one must refer to the person as being separate from the diagnosis (as in saying “people with autism” instead of autistic person), there are plenty of people on the spectrum who disagree with that. They believe that they don’t have a disorder necessarily, but rather being an aspie is just part of who they are, and is not something to be separate from (Ex. Jim Sinclair, Phil Schwarz, lastcrazyhorn).

People have the misconception that ASDs are something only in kids. I don’t know what they believe happens when these kids turn 21. That they just stop being autistic??? Hmm. On the realistic side, however, people with ASDs are not static in their growth as people, but rather they continue to develop socially/emotionally/mentally/physically. For instance, motor coordination is another area that aspies tend to have difficulties in. My coordination as a 24 year old is at least ten times as good as it was when I was a child or teen. There was a period in the 8th grade where I tripped going up the stairs almost every day.

People with Asperger’s Syndrome tend also to have a lot of comorbidities, or co-existing diagnoses. For example here are a few possible ones:

SPD/SID - Sensory Processing Disorder/Sensory Integration Disorder (it’s the same thing, but one is the old name and the other is the new - not that I remember which is which of course).

ADD/ADHD - A lot of people get diagnosed with this when they should get diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome. They might only show some of the traits of ADD/ADHD, but yet they still get the dx. People with AS, as mentioned before, are highly focused on their own pursuits. However, when having to learn something else, they often will get bored and zone out–especially if the teacher’s format is entirely aural.

OCD - Before getting diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome, I got diagnosed with atypical OCD. This was because while I had plenty of obsessions, I pretty much lacked the compulsion part of the dx. I did have a few, but none particularly life shattering.

GAD - I can’t say that I agree with every point of this article, but it does mention a few good things. One of the things I don’t agree about is that it says aspies don’t like meeting new people. That’s a crock. Some people with AS don’t like meeting new people, true, but there are a lot of others (myself included) that really like interacting with other people. We’re just not as good at it as perhaps we should be, developmentally speaking.

APD - Auditory Processing Disorder. I do some of this (even though I’m not diagnosed with this per se). I misunderstand words that sound alike. Aspies tend to have heightened senses, and more often than not they will pick up the background sounds around them more so than the words being spoken by another person.

People with AS tend to be very concrete. They tend to be (not always, but predominantly) visual learners. This means that in order for them to truly understand something, they really need to be able to see it.

So why get diagnosed? For me, being diagnosed was one of the best things that ever happened to me. When you have AS, people are constantly harping on you to “act your age” and to “grow up.” They seem to think that you’re being oversensitive just to piss them off or something. Plus, when I got dxed, I could stop worrying about my mental status. I felt like I was going crazy for so long. I mean, I like who I am. I like how AS allows me to think outside the box and experience the world in unique ways. But socially and stress-wise, I just wasn’t doing so great. Now, with my diagnosis, I know what things to watch out for that make me nutty or overstimulated (leading to shut down on my part - a point where I just can’t take any more input).

Acronyms can be wonderful, time-saving devices. On the other hand, they can be annoying as hell. Here’s a list that might help a bit.

More next time. :)

Basic HTML Intro Course

I learned HTML the hard way. My first ever blog, called LCH’s Blog is pretty defunct nowadays. However, I feel a certain connection to it, because it was my initial foray out into the world of blogging. That was back in 2001. I learned basic html on my own via personal observation and through online sources like Webmonkey.

You can see a website’s code if you go up to your toolbar and click on “View.” Next, scroll down and click on “page source.” Sometimes there’s really strange stuff in there. *laughs*

I can’t tell you the number of times just in the past couple of weeks that I’ve been puttering along, reading a great blogger, only to see either them say something like “I would like to put links in, but I don’t know how.”

So basics. First, we’ll start simple. In order to make things bold (other than just hitting control B), you have do one of two things:

  • HTML code goes in front of words and then behind. You make your statement, and then you close your mouth. The code for what I just wrote is this: “HTML code goes in <b>front</b> of words and then <b>behind</b>.”
  • The second version is just as simple, just a little longer. See? “The second version is just as simple, just a little <strong>longer</stronger>.”

Two choices exist for italics as well. Generally, both of these should work, but there are some places (like my comment screen) that will only take one of the two (in the case of my comment screen, it only takes the second of these two).

  • Wow, it sure is nice to meet you. = “Wow it sure is <i>nice</i> to meet you.”
  • Vs. “Wow, it sure is <em>nice</em> to meet you.”

Funny story, I was writing an exam essay once and was behind on time, so I was really booking it, you know? When I got done, I realized that I had switched into shorthand and had stuck HTML in there to indicate italics and whatnot! *laughs* I had to explain it to my teacher. *smacks head* OY.

A couple of others:

  • Underlining is always fun. There are two choices here too, but the second one is a little more complex, so I won’t tell you that part. Simply put, here’s what I did: “<u>Underlining</u> is always fun.”
  • And then I laughed nodded sympathetically. That’s what’s called a “strike through.” On most web pages, minus WordPress of course *rolls eyes*, here’s what you do: “And then I <s>laughed</s> nodded sympathetically.” Fun, no?

Okay, I know your brains are probably going whee POOF right now. How about just a couple more things?

So say you wanted to include a pic in your post? That’s pretty simple actually. You just need to have a picture link that ends with some of these letters: “jpeg, gif, bmp, png” something . . .

  • Next, you get to put the code in. Pretty shiny, no?
  • This is what I just did: <img src=”http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3253/2373801272_9da92a8b76_o.jpg”> - “Img src” = “image source.” Unless you know how to upload your pics directly from your computer, you’re going to have to have a method for viewing. I just post a lot of my pics over at Flickr.
  • One thing you don’t want to FORGET is this: When including any kind of link - be it pic or hyperlink or whatever, don’t forget to include the “http://” at the beginning. Otherwise, it won’t work.
  • If you’re linking from another site and want to find the code for a pic, there are a couple of different things you can do:
  • Complex option: Go to View –> Page source and look at all the code. Bleah.
  • Medium option: Right click on a pic and scroll down your menu until you get to “properties.” Click on that, and you’ve got it.
  • Easy: I can’t remember the exact words that Explorer uses for this option, but I can tell you what Firefox’s are. Right click on a pic, like in the medium option, and scroll down until you see: “Copy Image Location.” Click that, and then you can just paste it wherever you want. Muahahhahaha.

Okay, now say you want to embed a link somewhere. Not too hard, right? After all, everyone’s doing it, right?

  • Well, it’s not too hard. It just uses one simple code (I almost wrote in “chord” *snorts*). Webmonkey has all kinds of good links. For instance, they have a color code chart that kicks brass (musician humor).
  • So what’d I do? Funny you should ask . . . “For instance, they have a <a href=”http://www.webmonkey.com/reference/color_codes/”>color code chart</a> that kicks brass (musician humor).”

One more lesson today and then I promise you can throw things at me. Hmmm. Maybe I don’t mean that.

  • How about embedding a link in a picture? Scary? Not really.
  • This is what you want, right?
  • What you want to remember here is that you’re doing the exact same thing that you would be doing to make a regular link, only instead of making a word into a link, you’re making a picture.
  • Here, look:
  • <a href=”http://lastcrazyhorn.wordpress.com/2008/03/30/speaking-of-autism-awareness/ “><img src=”http://lastcrazyhorn.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/proud-to-know-someone.jpg”> </a>

Always remember to close your mouth after you’re done talking. Otherwise, every word on your page will be part of the link. Not pretty. :-?

And that is the basic lesson of the day. If this was totally dull, just let me know and I’ll go back to my regularly scheduled program without a word. :D

5 Things Meme

blue bell tunicateMuahahahhahahaahahhaha. I have been tagged. And later I get to tag others. *cackles madly*

Whitterer, one of my new favorites, tagged me. I found her page and just sat enthralled as I read post after post of her wonderful adventures she has thanks to her kids!

Okay, what do I have to do?

OH.

5 Things in my bag:

*giggles*

Just as a precursor, I must say that I have a lot of crap in my bag. Here’s my theory:

  • You never know when you’re going to walk through a time portal and end up in 1539; so it’s just better to be prepared!!!
  1. Wand–erm, that is to say . . . baton.
  2. The APA manual for writing. *shoots self in foot*
  3. Bottle opener
  4. Pictures of Little Dude/Nephew.
  5. Colored pencils - those twistable kind.

And of course there’s more. But it said 5, so I’m gonna do 5. I won’t mention the empty Adderall bottles. Or the empty tylenol bottles. Nor will I say anything about the cd player that used to be white. Nope.

5 Favorite Things In My Room

  1. My laptop. *kisses*
  2. My bed–which I see far too little of.
  3. My M*A*S*H collection - I own 9 of the 11 seasons on DVD.
  4. My Batman collection - 2 posters, 10 full length comic books, the last 5 movies, and 5 books.
  5. My desk (in undergrad, I did a lot of homework on my bed).

5 Things You Don’t Do Anymore

Other than sleep?

  1. Suck my thumb. I haven’t done that since I was 13 and my brother threatened to break my arm if I kept it up.
  2. Obsess about David Duchovney/watch X-files.
  3. Worry incessantly. I still do; just not to the previous extreme.
  4. Sleep in on Saturdays. Too much to do!
  5. Go to the bank. Nothing there!

5 Favorite Flowers

Um, but flowers make me sneeze.

Oh bother.

  1. Pumpkins? Oh well, here we go. Grape hyacinth. We had them everywhere in my backyard of the house I lived in from age 1 to 10. I used to make “soup” out of them all the time.
  2. Gerbera daisies
  3. Yellow flame zinnias
  4. Rebutia Muscula
  5. Blue Bell Tunicates

Those are some cool flowers.

*hums some of “Where Have All The Flowers Gone?”

On to tag a few others . . . *makes sure those that she is tagging have not been tagged as of yet . . . or at least not in the past week*

Okay, I checked as far as 2 weeks back, and really that should be considered above and beyond, don’tcha think?

Awalkabout, come on down!!!

Domestic Blister! Yep! You too! You and your sensible shoes!

Fragile What!? Yeah! You heard me! What did I tell you about playing with the neighborhood boys???

The Quirk Factor! No, you are not getting out of this! You go and tell your sister that you are sorry for putting worms down her shirt!

Um, hello??? What We Need? Earth to What We Need!!! It is way past your bedtime young lady!!! And what do you have to say of it???

What’s Your Sensory Type?

Dr. Winnie Dunn, in her new book called Living Sensationally, has determined a new way to classify people. Dr. Dunn is an Occupational Therapist (OT) who works with people who have Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), a fairly new description in and of itself, divides people into 4 groups of sensory types: Sensors, Avoiders, Seekers, and Bystanders.

As some of you may know, SPD is often seen as a comorbidity to Autism Spectrum Disorders. However, Dr. Dunn contends that everyone, regardless of diagnosis (or lack thereof), has a sensory type. Much like Jung though, she emphasizes that people do not fall neatly into one category or another. It is possible to see yourself potentially in all of the categories, but there does usually seem to be one that has preference over the others.

Here, look:

SEEKERS enjoy going to firework displays; make noises such as humming and whistling; order or cook spicy food; tend to touch people when talking to them; walk around barefoot; change daily routines to keep them interesting; enjoy extreme sports.

BYSTANDERS are easy-going and not easily ruffled; have to be called several times to get their attention; miss signposts; may leave dirt on their face or hands; find scratches or bruises and don’t know how they got them; don’t notice clutter until someone points it out; don’t notice ambient noise; may wear clothing askew.

AVOIDERS leave the room when a crowd starts to gather; like their surroundings clean and tidy; keep curtains or blinds drawn or partially drawn; make narrow food choices; don’t like getting their hands mucky; select solitary leisure activities; wear gloves for messy chores; steer clear of shopping malls.

SENSORS are distracted by sounds; startle easily; are bothered by fast-changing images on TV; have precise ideas about clothing textures; repeatedly pick the same food in restaurants; prefer clean design in the home; select only a few chosen rides at amusement parks; notice minor changes in recipes; get motion sickness more than others.

I’d have to say that the one I align most closely with would have to be the “Sensor.” Maybe. Then again, I have definite traits out of the Bystander and the Avoider categories. I think it may be more like I’m a Avoiding Sensor with Bystander tendencies. *laughs*

I went swinging yesterday at a local park. I must remember to do that again. I was completely calm and non-stimming for about 30 minutes afterwards. And that was after only about 10 minutes of swinging!

I highly recommend it. As I said to a friend of mine yesterday, swinging is kind of like a quiet way of yelling. You’re really out there, but without the pesky noise. *tsks* Noise like yelling freaks me out. That’s probably why I have problems getting angry. I just know how much I dislike it just when I experience it, let alone do it.

Anyway, I’ve compiled a list that you all may find worthwhile at some point someday. I’ve typed up all of my references for the content analysis that I’m writing and have devoted an entire page to them. The key words are “music” and “autism spectrum disorders.” I’m probably going to type up a whole other page just devoted to autism spectrum disorders’ sources too. I plan to keep adding onto these indefinitely. It’s highly likely that my thesis is going to be on this topic.

BTW, if you’re interested in Sensory Processing Disorder, here are a couple of names you may want to plug into Google: A. Jean Ayres and/or Lucy Jane Miller. I’ve also got some links on my sidebar. *points*

CAM - Complimentary and Alternative Medical Treatments

There was an article put out by a journal called Education and Training in Developmental Disabilities last year–2007–called “State of the Evidence Regarding Complimentary and Alternative Medical Treatments for Autism Spectrum Disorders,” written by Gardner T. Umbarger (the 3rd, no less), from Bowling Green State University.

It mentions in the abstract that parents are frustrated by the lack of effective treatments out there for their children and “often resort to complementary and alternative treatments (CAMs) to treat the symptoms of their child’s ASD.”

<Well no shit.>

It goes on to say that many of these treatments have little or no evidence of efficacy (effectiveness).

<Ditto above comment.>

This article reviews the current state of some of these CAMs, and addresses the evidence or lack thereof concerning these specific areas.

Just in case you’re wondering, these are the CAMs that it covers:

  • Facilitated Communication and Auditory Integrated Training
  • Secretin
  • Dietary Interventions
  • Heavy-metal chelation
  • Dolphin-assisted therapy
  • Vitamin B6 interventions
  • Music Therapy
  • Hippotherapy and therapeutic riding

It takes its time actually getting to the meat of the article, but once it does, it divides these therapies into two distinct categories: Interventions which are not Recommended, and Interventions Considered Promising Practices (italics were added by me).

Interventions which are not Recommended

  • Facilitated Communication and Auditory Integration Training

There is an organization which has taken a “significant role in evidence-based practices by taking specific positions on certain CAM interventions.” That organization is the American Speech and Hearing Association (ASHA). They have recommended against both of these as interventions as evidence-based practices (or in other words they’re saying that these two practices can not be touted as interventions with a background of anything like conclusive evidence to back them up – just my interpretation).

ASHA has found that the research on these two areas don’t meet the standards for scientific protocols for effectiveness (or as the author said, “efficacy”), and thus they have proposed that there need to be new protocols put in place for further research. Plus, ASHA put forth concerns that the negative consequences of misinterpreted messages when using FC outweighed any positive benefits of this practice.

In addition, only 6 studies on AIT met the criteria for inclusion in this study, but thanks to inconsistent methodologies used in these studies, no meta-analysis could be made. And of those 6, only half had positive results, while the other 3 had no results pointing towards efficacy.

<This is the kind of language used in these articles. Let me see if I can’t cut it down to just the nitty gritty after this. I can’t be here all day you know.>

  • Secretin

Some CAMs are lacking the evidence to really make a judgment call on them. Secretin is not one of those CAMs. In fact, there have been a large number of studies done on it, and the evidence is overwhelmingly against its use.

However, this article does make one comment in passing that while secretin has not shown to be effective at treating ASDs, it does seem to have a positive effect on some people in regards to gastrointestinal problems. This effect is probably largely responsible for the positive results that many tout when pointing towards secretin as an effective intervention in ASDs.

<I can vouch for that. I know that when I feel crummy, my stimming levels shoot way up and my abilities to put up with small trivialities (like other people or . . . idk, light) are reduced significantly.>

  • Dietary interventions

As of yet, although many people have individually seen positive effects of its use, dietary interventions are not supported as an effective intervention, purely based on the results from the evidence/lack thereof.

The article doesn’t discount them completely though, because the very last sentence says that “larger and higher quality clinical trials are warranted.”

<So get on the horn to folks you know and tell them to get some clinical trials going if you really want to see this supported!>

  • Heavy-metal chelation

I must say that this section is certainly one of the longest in this entire article. As the article says, according to the Food and Drug Administration (as of 2007), there have been no inclusion of thimerosal in vaccinations since 2001, and currently the only things with mercury-based preservatives in them are flu vaccines. With that said, the link between them and autism is inconclusive still to this day.

It also describes this intervention as “potentially dangerous,” and brings up the fact that there has been a death of a child as a result of this treatment. It says that until further trials have been done by the National Institute of Mental Health regarding this treatment, chelation should “not be considered an appropriate intervention to treat the symptoms associated with ASD.” You can find out more about those clinical trials here.

  • Dolphin-based therapy

Did you know that dolphins are used with kids who have ASDs to improve socialization and communication skills?

Who knew.

If you want to know more about this, look up the name of its creator, David Nathanson. However, several of his earlier studies have been criticized for having significant methodological flaws. Also, there is an inability to recreate the effects as seen originally. It mentions the need of further research being needed.

Interventions Considered Promising Practices

  • Vitamin B6 interventions

A large number of studies have reported positive results, but many of these studies have unfortunately used poor methodologies and inadequate dependent variables (the dependent variable is what the independent variable, that which is brought in via the experiment, affects) measures. Currently, there is a lack of inconsistent evidence.

  • Music Therapy as an intervention for ASD

“Music therapy involves using music and musical activities as a basis for therapeutic interventions.”

The most comprehensive study done on music therapy interventions was a meta-analysis published by the Journal of Music Therapy, volume 41, issue 2, in 2004. It was done by Jennifer Whipple (I know all that not merely from the references section, but also because I’m using that article in my content analysis). The study found that all of the music therapy interventions were slightly effective in improving “one or more areas of communication and social skills development.” In three other small-sample studies, positive results in response to music therapies were found regarding verbal and gestural communication skills. In addition to that evidence, other studies also showed potential as interventions for individuals with ASDs. As Whipple said however, more robust research is still needed in this area.

<Music therapy, thus far, has been the only thing even looked upon in a semi-favorable light. I can address the need for more research though. Music therapy has only been officially in existence since 1950 (although it was practiced long before that–think 1919 and before). Being that it is such a young practice, more robust research is still needed on it. Music therapy had many of its roots in veterans hospitals and consequently in geriatrics. However, there was a movie from the 1970’s *goes and digs through her notes and Google* called “The Music Child” this is about music therapy and nonverbal children who are most likely autistic (this from the mouth of one of my profs).>

  • Hippotherapy and Therapeutic Riding

Hippotherapy uses horses as therapy, and therapeutic riding uses riding as a goal directed recreational activity.  The majority of the studies done on this kind of therapy have primarily had positive results regarding a wide range of children with disabilities.  However, many of these studies were negatively impacted by use of poor methodologies and poor control of confounding and external variables.  More research is needed with higher quality protocols.

<I’ve noticed that many children on the spectrum react favorably to animals and vice versa.  Personally, horses terrify me merely because of the size difference and the fact that I have a fear of heights.  Well, really, it’s not a fear of heights, but a fear of falling.  Right.  Anyways, this looks like a potentially promising therapy, should they get more conclusive results.>

As the article says later on, the unfortunate fact regarding ASDs is that far more is known about what doesn’t work as compared to what does.  From this article, I’d say that music therapy has one of the highest chances of actually doing something to help.  Besides, music therapy is treatment of the whole person, not just their symptoms.

Congratulations. You Still Suck.

You know, just in case this was something you were in danger of forgetting.

“It’s a reality check,” the man said.

Well guess what. I don’t need a reality check. I get a reality check every time I walk down the damn street. I get a reality check every time I say hi to someone and they answer back by turning away from me. I get a reality check every time I open my damn mouth.

<Insert foot here> — I should really get this as a tattoo.

I get a reality check every time I go to one particular class. I get a reality check every time I talk too long. I get a reality check every time someone tells me upfront that they don’t believe I can do it. I get a reality check every time I find myself in a conversation with someone who thinks I’m a freak for talking to them. I get a reality check every time I leave my room.

No, I didn’t need another reality check.

Last night, we had to play at a bar’s open mic night. When I say “we,” I’m referring to my practicum class. That class has been a source of consternation for me all year, because there are too many people in that room, and about half of the time, it sends me into sensory overload just being in class for an hour. Whoever sits next to me knows to pass me a piece of paper and tell me to start drawing if they see me start to rock crazily or I stop talking.

The requirements for the open mic night were for us to play an instrument (i.e. - guitar, autoharp or piano) and sing a song–all by memory, in addition to having good rhythm, pitch, yada yada yada. I’ve been practicing this music for 2 weeks. I had planned to do Cat Steven’s “If You Want To Sing Out, Sing Out” on the piano. I was ready to go. That afternoon I had sung the song through at least 15 times. I knew it. I had it.

I get up to play, and my fingers just start shaking and my brain starts melting. There were at least 20, and more like 30 (at least), people in that crowd. Among the scattering of loud, noisy strangers, sits half my class (the other half went the week before).

I restarted the song twice and made it all the way to the bridge before my brain collapsed. I couldn’t remember the words, or the chords, and suddenly it seemed to me as though I had never seen the keyboard before. It was as if I was sitting in front of an alien instrument with a configuration that I had never seen before.

So I announced to the crowd that I would see if I couldn’t go on later in the evening and I jumped off the stage. Oh, did I mention that this is a 3rd of my grade???

I go back to talk to the professor and ask him if I can sing later in the line up. He says “no, that was it.” And I ask him (slightly hysterically) if he’s going to fail me. He says no. I say, does this mean I can’t be a music therapist? He says it means that this was a reality check.

So I don’t hit him. Or cuss him. Or flip him off.

Even though I really wanted to.

I just walk out of the place, out of the noise, out from the people, out onto the street, and I just walk to the end of the block, sit down at the edge of a building around the corner, and cry.

Before long, two friends join me. And then later, two more. We sit and we talk and I cry. As they pointed out, when as a music therapist am I going to need to be able to sit in a bar and play for a crowd?

But all that keeps running through my head is this:

This is a reality check to confirm that yes, you still suck.

I got my undergrad in instrumental music ed. I wanted to be a band director. I wanted to that, right up until the semester that I had to student teach. And then I changed my mind. Standing in front of a big crowd (of any population) terrifies me. My brain walks off and my body stops working, and soon I’m like a hollow shell of myself. And being up there last night just brought all of the student teaching experience back into my head full force.

So yes. I still suck.

And that on top of all the other crap I’ve had to put up with this semester was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

BTW, you should check this out. I used a tool to make it, but other than that, it’s all me. Something I think you’ll figure out, soon enough.
View this montage created at One True Media
Batman Extreme

Really, I Mean . . .

AAAAAAA!!!

That’s most of it.

I’ve gotten through at least 3 assignments–more like 5–in the past few days. I have another 2 or 3 to go before this week is over too. And then I get to plop down and just write . . . and write . . . and write some more. And if I get tired of that, I might just write some more. *grinds head against a wall*

Plus, this morning, I overslept. This was a Bad Thing. I had my last practicum of the semester this week. The last session is not one that you want to miss. I woke up 13 minutes before I was supposed to be there. It takes 6 minutes to make it across the campus from where I live to the music building. ‘

I got there with 2 minutes to spare, meaning that I got ready in less than 5 minutes (takes a little time to get out the door and down the stairs).

Last night, one of the things that I did was give a 50 minute presentation on the goth subculture. Yes, I did it all on a wordpress page. So now you can read it and laugh. Well, let me put it this way. There are only three goth bands that the majority of people agree are definitely goth, and those three bands could have just as well been punk! *laughs* Well, proto-punk . . . but that’s another story. Geez, I swear that I always learn the most music history when I just study it on my own. *nods*

Anyways, this is just a short post to let you all know I’m still here, crazy and bouncing along.

Following The Yellow Brick Road of Interests

I like to follow my interests around; you know, to see where they go. Sometimes they’re naughty and they get into things better left alone. ;) They are frequently tangential, following a certain kind of logic that makes sense to me . . . and few others. I suppose the reason for that is because in order to understand my line of logic, you have to understand how things make sense to me; and since I don’t learn the same way as most people, learning how something makes sense to me is probably best left alone too.

The worst trouble that this kind of sense making ever got me into was in music history. My teacher was one of those “floaty, never nail it down, working in concepts of higher reasoning” sorts of professors. On one hand, she told us that there was often no right answer that could be nailed down. On the other hand, if you put the wrong answer down on a test, you got counted off. *growls*

Basically, what I do when learning something new, is make connections to the things that I already know. But since I tend to pick up odd/random facts about different subjects, then the things I know tend not to correlate with anyone else’s knowledge anyway. So that’s already one check against me, so to speak.

Here’s the scenario:

Introduction of new knowledge.

Clarification of what has been said.

How it all works together (when I say, I mean all).

  • including other extraneous, possibly seemingly unrelated topics.

Clarification that I have the connections right.

Repeat until clear.

That’s the part that I get into trouble with professors on. They think that when I am clarifying my connections, that what I’m really doing is wasting their time.

Let me see if I can’t think up some kind of example. I could give an equation easily enough, but I think this would be clearer with something a bit more concrete.

Okay, say we’re learning about a particular composer, like say, Percy Grainger. The teacher mentions that he had a few eccentricities. So I say, well like what? One person’s eccentricities are another person’s norm, after all.

So the professor answers with the usual oddities (e.g. - he didn’t like public transport, so he tended to hitchhike a lot; he didn’t like ironing his clothes; he made his own clothes; he had strange eating habits; he possibly had some kind of bizarre mother-son incestuous relationship; he was drawn very much to self-flagellation . . . ).

See, and what I’ll do, in addition to all that’s mentioned above, is get stuck on particular detail of one particular thing or two, like self-flagellation and its parent category–eccentricities. But I tend not to tell the professor what point I’ve gotten stuck on, because to stop the process is to forget the process, is to forget where I am and what I know up to that point. Basically, if I don’t get this connection clear in my head, I’ll forget everything and have to start over. Generally speaking.

“Oh,” I’d probably say (this is imaginary, if you will remember), “so he’s a goth.”

The professor, at this point, will begin to have fantasies about murdering and pillaging the available countryside, starting with one particular student.

“What?!?” The professor would splutter.

“Or well, he could have been a goth; you know, if he had born later.” I say, making allowance for the fact that goths didn’t exist back in the day as we know them to now. Off the top of my head, I’d say that Grainger was born in possibly 1882 (I think), in Australia (I know). Or maybe it was 1883. No, it was definitely ‘82. July, I think.

The professor can now see themselves putting their hands around a certain student’s neck and just squeezing until nothing more is said.

“Why do you say that you think he was a goth?” The professor will ask, through gritted teeth no doubt, stifling the urge to yell out, “What?!? Are you insane???”

“Well, it’s not because of the black or anything.” I say quickly, wanting to clarify my position.

“What black?!?” The professor says, the hand holding the chalk starting to flex and twist (soon the chalk will be broken).

“Well, I’ve not really ever seen much terry cloth, but I don’t imagine it would be black.”

“What???”

“Well, it could be, but that’s not my point. I don’t think he’s goth because of the black. Even though that would clarify it nowadays.”

“Explain.” The professor would say, teeth still gritted, cheeks turning pink.

“Well, back in the day, lots of people wore black. In that sense, he was probably no different. But if he were to be in today’s world and all he wore was black, then that’d be a bigger sign for his gothness.”

Upon catching the looks of everyone around me, I start talking faster, finally realizing that neither the conversation (nor the converser) are going to make it out alive unless I start getting to my point and soon.

“What I’m really thinking about in terms of the goth connection is the self-flagellation.”

The professor looks like she/he is forcing themselves to take very deep, long, sustained breaths. At least that could be an explanation for why the professor is suddenly rolling his/her eyes back in his/her head.

Then, as always, someone else in the class would have to ask what self-flagellation is.

Of course I know. I almost always know the bizarre terms or long vocabulary that no one else knows. This is largely due to the fact that I read a lot, and almost no one else in any of my other classes (especially in high school) ever did/does.

Okay, so think about it. Grainger liked self-flagellation (liked? In the museum he created for himself as to have a place to store his random and often strange collections, he amassed over 65 whips by the time he died. I actually want to say 70, but over 65 is a pretty safe number); he liked the feel of terry cloth, so instead of buying clothes like other people, he just made his own . . . out of terry cloth (but was it black? Who knows); so, he didn’t follow the contemporary sense of fashion (remember, he didn’t like having his clothes ironed either); his was ultimately a gentle spirit, often loaning out money to friends who were in need; he and his mother were certainly an interesting thing (they pushed the boundaries certainly); he expressed himself differently than most (his music was of the boundary pushing/testing variety) . . . so I figure, he could have either been a goth, or he was an aspie. But I would probably not have mentioned that in class, since there are only a handful of profs out there who know what aspies are.

Course, then again, I have the feeling that a lot of goths are probably aspies . . . or is it the other way around? Generally speaking, one of the themes of the goth is the person who has been mistreated by popular culture–and there again is the connection with aspies.

Now, here’s what the teacher should have done; instead of reacting so spasmodically, they should have merely said something along the lines of, “Tell me what factor it is that connects those two worlds for you.” Yeah, I think that would work. I say “think,” because there have been rare few who have been able to make the learning process simple for me, and I haven’t really run into that many who have been able to stay calm and simply ask the right questions. Of course, I know that it’s extraordinarily hard to figure out which questions are the right ones, but I figure that anything is better than wigging out.

I mean, seriously, “What do you mean by that?” Much too broad.

But lastcrazyhorn, you’re the one making up the scenario; what about that?

Yeah, but I’m basing it off of many of the reactions that I’ve personally experienced throughout my life. This is real stuff.

Anyway, so now I can see that I’m completely off-topic from where I wanted to be. I’m just going to have to abruptly segue into the actual intent of what I’m meaning to talk about.

All this is to say that I often am able to find odd connections to things (and really, the example I gave above was pretty mild compared to some of my stranger leaps of logic), that aren’t seen otherwise by “typical” folk.

Now, this is fully demonstrated in my hunt for websites and clues in the Batman: The Dark Knight viral marketing campaign. I went on a trek yesterday that clued me into another four or five websites that I had previously been unaware of. It all started (well, this particular burst of clues did anyways) with an email that I got from Jim Gordon, of the Gotham PD:

My friend,

Indictments are about to be handed down. If you don’t want your name on one, we’ll need your full cooperation in an upcoming operation.

In case you haven’t heard, we are struggling with a bit of corruption in the department. I’m not about to let the Gotham PD collapse in on itself, so we’re taking action. We’ve identified a group of offenders that need to be apprehended. Problem is, most of these cops are hightailing it out of the city. But a C.I. just like you just gave us some information on their last known whereabouts. Now all we need is to catch them. This is where you come in.

Consider yourself on deck. I’ll contact you next week, and let’s just say it’s in your best interest to play along. County’s not a place you want to spend the rest of your life.

Lt. Jim Gordon, MCU

I got this on April 18th, 2008. The last note I got was on April 13th, 2008 (I’m including the years in there for clarity’s sake later on).
Okay, maybe you’re like, what’s the big deal about the note?

Ah, my little friend. *rubs hands together* Muahahahhha. That’s where it starts.

I had a look at the email address: jim.gordon@gpdmcu.com. I thought to myself, “Self, I wonder if that’s a website?”

Soon, I found myself at the Gotham Police Major Crimes Unit homepage. On that site, there is a link to the Gotham Police homepage. You know, you can see a page’s code if you go to View and then click on Page Source. There are three pages of various info on the Gotham Police site. I search through the source material of all three. On one, I found that there was a photograph that had been linked from another site–The Gotham Times site. Now, I had found that site already, but hadn’t looked through it in about a thousand years. There were many articles I scanned, but only two of them actually gave me ideas.

These ideas let me to put certain search terms into Google, and lo and behold, we get two new sites:

The Maiden Avenue Report
Citizens for Batman

Now, I just now noticed something about the Maiden Avenue Report (a site for primarily factitious rumors, I believe). We, in this day and time, have a tendency to zone out when it comes to ads, but I just realized something big about the ads at this site. They’re all Gotham oriented!

Let’s see here; now I’ve got four more sites to check out:

Gotham City Rail
Saint Swithuns Catholic Church
Rossi’s Delicatessen - complete with phone number . . . I wonder where my cell phone has wandered off to?
Gotham Ferry System

Now, the way you can almost always tell which websites are part of the viral marketing loop is this: They don’t have long addresses, and there’s no webmaster/privacy policy yada yada at the bottom of the page.

Anyway, I found a couple of others, but you should be able to see those from my sidebar. I gotta go add these now!

Welcome To Aspie-Land

I recently made a comment on someone’s blog who had just been introduced to aspie-land (this place I and many others now find ourselves). She mentioned some links that she found helpful thus far, but I noticed that a great many of them were just the regular surface standards (ASA and Autism Speaks etc.). So . . . I told her a few more.

Wrong Planet - a forum for people with or related to Asperger’s Syndrome
Autistic Self-Advocacy Network
Tony Attwood’s homepage (his book, “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome” is spot on too)
Benefits of Asperger’s Syndrome
I Think I Pictures, You Teach In Words
A great speech about neurodiversity by Ari Ne’eman
Study skills for those on the spectrum (directed towards university students, but certain things should still apply for everyone)
Info about music therapy (a therapy that has shown to be especially effective for those on the spectrum)
What Obama has to say about health care and autism
Proprioceptive Dysfunction
Elmindreda’s reflections on autism
Why Jim Sinclair (a big name in the autism world) dislikes person-first language
The discovery of “aspie” criteria
10 terrific traits of autistic people
Ways to manage Executive Dysfunction (something a lot of people on the spectrum have)

I tried to link to either specific blog pages or sites that deal specifically with the spectrum. I didn’t include just blogs in general, because really, there are too many good ones out there to list. So I told her at the end of my reply that she could find all of these, plus more, at my site.

Did I do good?

BTW, I’m going to eventually start a new page on my right hand column called “Guide to Being an Aspie.” I’m not planning on just linking my own stuff (as this post probably shows). If you have anything else that you think should be included on this list (or a future list), feel free to let me know either through replying to a post or hunting out my email from this site (it’s listed; you just have to find it). *laughs*